I can't get no... satisfaction.

My final for my Hermeneutics class was on Galatians 5. In case you are not aware of the topic of Galatians 5 (which I wasn't before I read this passage like a thousand times), it's about freedom in Christ, through the Spirit. The last question on the final was "Are you habitually choosing to walk in the Spirit or in the flesh?"

Looking at my life right now, I'd have to say I'm trying to satisfy my flesh. Deep down, I just want my soul to be satisfied, and I keep trying all these different ways (ways that attempt to satisfy my sinful nature).

I know what really satisfies. I know what really sets me free. I even know exactly what's caused me to get to the point I'm at. At each step in the past month, I've overwhelmingly made the wrong choice, and I knew it was the wrong choice. I think of Romans 7:18-19

That verse is like the story of my life. I know what's good, I want to do it, I know what's evil, I don't want to do it... but somehow I end up doing it. It's so frustrating to see that happen over and over again in my life.

This break I got coming up... it's a break I need. I need to step away from this place, and all the bad habits I've set here. I need to calm down and take some time to think about what I'm doing, and what direction my life is headed. I've got so many goals and plans for this break, I just hope that I can accomplish those goals. I guess I might as well share my goals with you, maybe you can help hold me accountable:

• Re-read Deadly Viper: Character Assassins and actually make some serious applications to my life
• Read Constrarian's Guide to Knowing God: Spirituality for the Rest of Us by Larry Osborne, Stand Against the Wind: Awaken the Hero Within by Erwin Raphael McManus, and Practicing Greatness: 7 Disciplines of Extraodinary Spirutal Leaders by Reggie McNeal. These are 3 books I need to pre-course work that I have for a class next semester.
• Do my devotions everyday, along with write in my prayer journal. Devotions first thing in the morning, prayer journal just before bed.
• Learn how to make a budget
• Co/teach a lesson or two in IA
• Look into some information about Moody, Trinity, Oak Hills, and Northwestern
• Make a day trip to Chicago (I need me some Portillo's!)
• Eat at OCB at least 3 times
• Get a shelf to use at camp
• Watch LOTR
• Win the lottery (or get an inheritance from some lost uncle at a worth of about 3 million dollars)
• Practice my farting on command skills
• Spend some time with my family
• Get in a jogging habit (Jon, I'm going to ask for your help on this one)
• and, hang with a ton of my good friends (if your name isn't listed, then you are one of my good friends: Michael Jackson, Joel Osteen, and Big Bird)

but I do it anyway

No Shave November

Time is almost up for No Shave November. Here at SBR, we began the month long process on Oct. 25th because the students here leave camp on the 24th of Nov and we wanted to have a party at the end of the month! Not to brag or anything, but I look pretty gosh darn sexy. Not that I normally don't look sexy (c'mon... me llamo Delicious). But I'm looking forward to shaving the nastiness off of my neck. I'm totally keepin my hot goatee tho! I'll get a pic of me up here by tomorrow night at midnight!

One week long, hope I stay strong.

This is my last week of school. I'm allowed to leave Monday after I finish my finals. I'm not really sure what my problem is, but I haven't really been able to accomplish much school work lately. At the same time, my devotional time, prayer life, and just hanging out time have all vanished. I really do not know what I'm so busy doing, but it's sure doing a good job of keeping me occupied. I'm trying my hardest to get working on my homework and studying for finals, but it's tough work.

I'm really discouraged because my homework has become a chore. I wanted to take these classes as a way to increase my knowledge of God, and to help me learn how to grow closer to my Maker. It's come to the point where I'm just doing the work to get it done... just to get a grade. I'm not really sure how I got in this mind-set, but it really sucks and I can't seem to get out of it.

I came here assuming this would be easy as pie to get to know my Abba, but it's just a huge struggle. I'm not sure if it's the people I surround myself with, or my own sin issues, or my lack of desire or whatever... but I'm just kind of stuck in a rut.

Chapel and Quest

This weekend some of us NBI students lead worship for three chapel sessions for about 40 middle school students. We were asked kinda last second, so it was pretty unprepared. Despite that, it was a great success. Jim somethin-er-other was the leader of the group, and he said that this was the best chapel he's ever seen. uh... yeah I was shocked a little bit. But I thanked him and several other people gave us good reviews too. I'm just glad we could help lead these guys into worship. They had a great time here and I'm glad we could minister to them in that way.

In addition to that, tonite Quest was a grand success too. We played Undignified, Every move I make, and Everlasting love. It was the first time we did some songs with motions or movement. With some help of the leaders, we actually got the kids jumpin around and having some fun. And when we were done I was filthy sweaty! It was great!

Schedule

I don't enjoy making a schedule. I like to just go with the flow. But going with the flow is making me get nothing done. I've been getting like half of my homework done, and I've been procrastinating and not completing countless other tasks.

I'm really tired of staying up late doing homework, and not having other things done that need to be done. It's time where I'm going to actually stop just thinking about writing a schedule, and I'm going to do it... and stick to it. Officially I've been working on making a schedule for the past three weeks, but today is actually the first day that I've actually written anything down in my planner thing. So today is just the start. We'll see what happens from here...