What I got for Christmas

This is not the part where I list what I got for Christmas... if I can remember them all...

a huge knife, a bears shirt, popcorn, cookies, gift card, cucumber melon candle and body wash, a giant coloring book with crayons, candy, more candy, a little more candy, cheez-its, special sweat-absorbing socks, Dr. Pepper, silly putty. That's all I can remember. I'm not sure if there's more or not... but that's what I got.

Also, I'm not sure if this is a Christmas gift or not, but I'm getting a laptop, it shall be ordered online tonite! I so pumped.

Midnight Tubing

Yeah, there's nothing better than going tubing down a hill of pure ice after midnight. I actually got quite a few people to come out and hang out at the tube hill. It didn't last long, because everybody was exhausted, including me. But it was still a blast! Rachel went of the jump on a saucer and just flew! She got some wicked air, and soon as she was in the air, her saucer took off and she just smaaaaashed down on the ice. She's got a bruise about the size of a 20 oz bottle. I fell down about 4 times yesterday, not all are from tubing either. Each time i fell, I landed on the same spot... man am I sore today! But it's all worth having a good time for. 

Pencil

Today I saw a pencil sitting on the desk.

Yes Man

Yes! I just saw Yes Man with Jim Carrey and Zooey Deschanel. It gets a great review from me. I thought it was a great movie! Not absolutely hilarious, but there was some funny crap in it. I went with my good man El Suavo. Definitely a 12 bucks well spent (that includes my large Pibb). GO SEE IT!

Sledding

Yeah, that's right. Nothing beats sledding after getting 14 inches of snow! I went with my dad, Jeremy, Jesse, and Faith. Oh it was a blast. We took like a thousand sleds and a few tubes out and went crazy. We built a sweet jump too. After doing that for what seemed like hours, we came home and we're just chillin now. The first sledding of the year was great, though. Can't wait to get up to SBR and go on their fantastic hills!

Question for you...

What am I good at? If I asked you that question, and just left it open like that, what would you say?

I wanted to visit the Hospital

So lastnight I decided to smash my finger in this here ping pong table and rip it open. Since I'm in the middle of nowhere, it took 20 minutes to get to the hospital, an hour to wait in the ER, another hour to get XRays, and another hour to wait to get stitched up (9 numbing shots, 5 stitches), then an hour for them to sign us out. Rediculous. It hurt pretty bad. Not a pleasant night. So the ping pong table pic is the general area I pinched it it, i'm not positive exaclt where, but i think it was bewtween that black and gray part. The tomato soup looking pic is a styrofoam cup of soapy water that they had me soak my finger in for 2 hours. Then the other 2 are the best pics I have of it my sick finger. These pics were taken on my phone, so they suck pretty bad. It was worse than it looks in the pics too. My buddy, El Suavo, is the lucky man that took me to the hostable. He got to sit in that chair for 3 hours. What a night. I gotta get the stitches out in 10 days. It doesn't really limit what I do, I'm just afraid of hitting it on something... i know it would hurt so bad. But that's about the whole story. Man it bled like a beast and hurt like a doctor. Can't wait to get the stitches out.

Disc golf in December

Aint nothin better than disc golfing in some snow! I went out today with Jon, Super Suave, Meckley, Shawn, and Mike. We didn't let the 15 degree temperature or the 20 mph winds slow us down, except for that one time i threw a white disc and couldn't find it. But it tooks us a good 2 hrs 40 mnts to complete 18 holes. It was cold, but we were all bundled up and I was actually sweating most of the time. I ended up with like 9 over par... I guess pretty good for not disc golfing for a few months. Time to go eat Tacos and Ice cream tacos, and then go see a movie.

Goals Update

So I had some goals this break. Here they are again, and then how I'm doing with each one:

• Re-read Deadly Viper: Character Assassins and actually make some serious applications to my life (I decided not to read this, partially because I don't know where I put the book, and partially because I feel that God will show me what he wants in these next three books)


• Read Constrarian's Guide to Knowing God: Spirituality for the Rest of Us by Larry Osborne, Stand Against the Wind: Awaken the Hero Within by Erwin Raphael McManus, and Practicing Greatness: 7 Disciplines of Extraodinary Spirutal Leaders by Reggie McNeal. These are 3 books I need to pre-course work that I have for a class next semester. (I began reading "Practicing Greatness." I think I've got like 3 or 4 chapters done. It's better than I would normally do, but it's not as much as I'd like to have done. I need to do about 3 chapters a day, and I've been doing 1 a day. I'm not sure what I'm going to do about this)


• Do my devotions everyday, along with write in my prayer journal. Devotions first thing in the morning, prayer journal just before bed. (Yeah, this hasn't happened yet. Maybe I can start tonite)


• Learn how to make a budget (I talked with Jon today about the way he thinks a budget works best. It's pretty interesting. It's going to be a challenge for me to do it, but I will try (I can explain it to you if your really interested))


• Co/teach a lesson or two in IA (Turns out that this isn't going to work out, so this isn't going to happen, but that's ok. Teaching was not actually my goal, I don't know how to explain what this goal behind teaching is, but there are other ways I can accomplish it)


• Look into some information about Moody, Trinity, Oak Hills, and Northwestern (Hasn't happened yet. I'll probably wait till I get back to kenosha to do this, and I will probably apply to all four places)


• Make a day trip to Chicago (I need me some Portillo's!) (AHHH... not yet, not sure when. it's not important, its just if i have time I'll throw it in)


• Eat at OCB at least 3 times (Eh... I'm changing it to once, and I haven't gone yet)


• Get a shelf to use at camp (Not yet)


• Watch LOTR (I'm half way through the second one)
  Win the lottery (or get an inheritance from some lost uncle at a worth of about 3 million dollars) (My great great uncle, twice removed died and for some reason I get 300,000 from him. His name is Fergnun (It's french or somethin))


• Practice my farting on command skills (I can now fart on command, aren't you proud?)


• Spend some time with my family (Spent a little time with them, I'm not at home now though, but when I get back I'll spend plenty of time with them. I'll probably spend too much time with them. They'll probably get sick of me.)


• Get in a jogging habit (Jon, I'm going to ask for your help on this one) (Actually... I've gone jogging. I ran on a treadmill for 20 minutes on monday or tuesday night. I ran almost two miles. Pretty good for not exercising for like 3 years)


• and, hang with a ton of my good friends (if your name isn't listed, then you are one of my good friends: Michael Jackson, Joel Osteen, and Big Bird) (Oh yeah baby... I've hunged with my peeps, you know what I'm sayin?)

There's the update on those. Here are a few new ones:

• Work on making my daily schedule
• When I get home, to put up about a million lights on my house
• Relationship work
• Get some resist-a-bands

I colored

I colored these pictures today. I'm quite the artist. The first one is color inverted, I thought it looked kind of cool

You wouldn't believe me if I told you

I'd probably waste my time if I tried to prove to you that it's true, but it's totally for real. Last night, for the first time in many moons I went to the gym. That might be easy to believe, but would you believe me if I said I worked out while I was there? Well, believe it. I went with Jon to his gym and worked out for about an hour and a half. We were on treadmills for 20 minutes, then we did "resistabands" or whatever they're called. It was an intense workout. I pushed through it all, it was hard, but I made it. Even tho the resistance training stuff was super difficult, I enjoyed it...almost as much as I enjoyed running.

Now I just need to recouperate... which might take like a whole week.

btw... the picture on the right is Jon working out, and I now look like the guy on the left, except I'm not black.

I can't get no... satisfaction.

My final for my Hermeneutics class was on Galatians 5. In case you are not aware of the topic of Galatians 5 (which I wasn't before I read this passage like a thousand times), it's about freedom in Christ, through the Spirit. The last question on the final was "Are you habitually choosing to walk in the Spirit or in the flesh?"

Looking at my life right now, I'd have to say I'm trying to satisfy my flesh. Deep down, I just want my soul to be satisfied, and I keep trying all these different ways (ways that attempt to satisfy my sinful nature).

I know what really satisfies. I know what really sets me free. I even know exactly what's caused me to get to the point I'm at. At each step in the past month, I've overwhelmingly made the wrong choice, and I knew it was the wrong choice. I think of Romans 7:18-19

That verse is like the story of my life. I know what's good, I want to do it, I know what's evil, I don't want to do it... but somehow I end up doing it. It's so frustrating to see that happen over and over again in my life.

This break I got coming up... it's a break I need. I need to step away from this place, and all the bad habits I've set here. I need to calm down and take some time to think about what I'm doing, and what direction my life is headed. I've got so many goals and plans for this break, I just hope that I can accomplish those goals. I guess I might as well share my goals with you, maybe you can help hold me accountable:

• Re-read Deadly Viper: Character Assassins and actually make some serious applications to my life
• Read Constrarian's Guide to Knowing God: Spirituality for the Rest of Us by Larry Osborne, Stand Against the Wind: Awaken the Hero Within by Erwin Raphael McManus, and Practicing Greatness: 7 Disciplines of Extraodinary Spirutal Leaders by Reggie McNeal. These are 3 books I need to pre-course work that I have for a class next semester.
• Do my devotions everyday, along with write in my prayer journal. Devotions first thing in the morning, prayer journal just before bed.
• Learn how to make a budget
• Co/teach a lesson or two in IA
• Look into some information about Moody, Trinity, Oak Hills, and Northwestern
• Make a day trip to Chicago (I need me some Portillo's!)
• Eat at OCB at least 3 times
• Get a shelf to use at camp
• Watch LOTR
• Win the lottery (or get an inheritance from some lost uncle at a worth of about 3 million dollars)
• Practice my farting on command skills
• Spend some time with my family
• Get in a jogging habit (Jon, I'm going to ask for your help on this one)
• and, hang with a ton of my good friends (if your name isn't listed, then you are one of my good friends: Michael Jackson, Joel Osteen, and Big Bird)

but I do it anyway

No Shave November

Time is almost up for No Shave November. Here at SBR, we began the month long process on Oct. 25th because the students here leave camp on the 24th of Nov and we wanted to have a party at the end of the month! Not to brag or anything, but I look pretty gosh darn sexy. Not that I normally don't look sexy (c'mon... me llamo Delicious). But I'm looking forward to shaving the nastiness off of my neck. I'm totally keepin my hot goatee tho! I'll get a pic of me up here by tomorrow night at midnight!

One week long, hope I stay strong.

This is my last week of school. I'm allowed to leave Monday after I finish my finals. I'm not really sure what my problem is, but I haven't really been able to accomplish much school work lately. At the same time, my devotional time, prayer life, and just hanging out time have all vanished. I really do not know what I'm so busy doing, but it's sure doing a good job of keeping me occupied. I'm trying my hardest to get working on my homework and studying for finals, but it's tough work.

I'm really discouraged because my homework has become a chore. I wanted to take these classes as a way to increase my knowledge of God, and to help me learn how to grow closer to my Maker. It's come to the point where I'm just doing the work to get it done... just to get a grade. I'm not really sure how I got in this mind-set, but it really sucks and I can't seem to get out of it.

I came here assuming this would be easy as pie to get to know my Abba, but it's just a huge struggle. I'm not sure if it's the people I surround myself with, or my own sin issues, or my lack of desire or whatever... but I'm just kind of stuck in a rut.

Chapel and Quest

This weekend some of us NBI students lead worship for three chapel sessions for about 40 middle school students. We were asked kinda last second, so it was pretty unprepared. Despite that, it was a great success. Jim somethin-er-other was the leader of the group, and he said that this was the best chapel he's ever seen. uh... yeah I was shocked a little bit. But I thanked him and several other people gave us good reviews too. I'm just glad we could help lead these guys into worship. They had a great time here and I'm glad we could minister to them in that way.

In addition to that, tonite Quest was a grand success too. We played Undignified, Every move I make, and Everlasting love. It was the first time we did some songs with motions or movement. With some help of the leaders, we actually got the kids jumpin around and having some fun. And when we were done I was filthy sweaty! It was great!

Schedule

I don't enjoy making a schedule. I like to just go with the flow. But going with the flow is making me get nothing done. I've been getting like half of my homework done, and I've been procrastinating and not completing countless other tasks.

I'm really tired of staying up late doing homework, and not having other things done that need to be done. It's time where I'm going to actually stop just thinking about writing a schedule, and I'm going to do it... and stick to it. Officially I've been working on making a schedule for the past three weeks, but today is actually the first day that I've actually written anything down in my planner thing. So today is just the start. We'll see what happens from here...

Lost Time

Nine days since I've posted. I think the less I post on here, the more busy I am. Also correlating seems to be how much time I spend with God. So by seeing how often I post is usually a clue as to how much I'm letting things slip away. I have been letting myself slip away too. Not like I had a perfect relationship with God before, but these past ten day's I've spent about no time with God and I can really see how negatively it's affecting me. My whole thought process is different... in a bad way too. I need to get back on track before I look back and realize I've missed out on a month's worth of talking to God.

Cause you had a bad day...

OK, so I didn't really have a bad day... just a really really long one. I set my alarm for 7:01 and snoozed it ten times, to finally get up at 7:50. I had to get up because on Fridays, all students are supposed to work. This morning my job was to clean the lodge, Erikson, and Nicolet. Not bad, but it took me from 8:30 till noon to do them.
Then there was the afternoon. I was chosen to go to Mole Lake... and long story short... I spent the whole afternoon picking up garbage in a giant field. Have you ever spent 4 hours hauling massive amounts of garbage and huge chunks of iron and steel to a dumpster 50 yards away? Doesn't sound like much... but it was so much work. I bet a big part was that I'm sick a bit still... so I'm kinda low on the energy. Know what I'm sayin?

I've got a crap load of hw due tomorrow, and I haven't started yet. I'm dead tired, I need a shower, and I haven't given Jon a titty twister in over 2 months.... my life is rough!

and that's all my complainin fer the day.

I ANGRY!

So I've been a part of leading worship for like, what... 4 years? So you think I should be used to it, right? Yeah, I'm totally used to playing guitar and singing... practices go perfect, almost flawless. I really don't know what the deal is, but I still freak out when the real worship time comes. I start making mistakes in songs that I could play in my sleep! I get so nervous that I cant function. I really don't know what my problem is. It just frustrates me so much. I am just never ever content with how worship goes. The funny part is that nobody has ever said anything bad about when I lead worship. Ever. It's always compliments... when I know I really screwed up.

I dunno, that just really hit me hard tonite after Quest.

Prayer

Not that I feel fine saying this, but I've had a crappy prayer life (ok, nonexistant) most of my life. Just recently I've made an effort to actually talk to God. Long story short... I'm just seeing how powerful prayer really is. It's just awesome to see the things that happen when you bring things to God and depend on Him.

My new prayer method is A.C.T.S. Whenever I pray, I go through A.C.T.S. and it helps me focus a lot. And I write it all down, it's so cool looking back in your journal and seeing how God is faithful. In case you don't know, A.C.T.S. stands for Adoration, Confession, Thanksgiving, and Supplication. Basically, when I pray, I start of by giving praise to God (God's good, great, holy, perfect, etc.). Then I confess my sins... this part sucks to be honest. Then I thank God for the things and people He's given me, and other things He's helped with. Then I go to supplication... I ask for a supply: its just where I can ask for whatever. Just to help myself get in the habit of doing each part, I list 10 things of each... no more, no less. I really take my time when I do it (up to like 2 hours) but thats mostly because the Adoration part is really hard.

Another part that I love... I tell people I will pray for them... and I actually do. Before, it's not like i would intentionally not pray for them, It's just I forgot and didn't pray much. But it's so cool being able to pray for other people and see God work in their lives.

Yey Jesus.

Strep Throat... UR MOMMA!

I think I've got strep throat. My throat hurts. Its swollen and there's white bump a lumps. It's not really that bad, it's just quite annoying and I would love it if it would go away. I am not going to be able to go to the doctor until tuesday. That sucks.

In light of my sickness, today was a work day. Man am I exhausted. Dinner is in about 5 minutes. I'm going to eat, then go to sleep. I hope am supposed to work in the kitchen tomorrow, but do you think I should be working in the kitchen when I've got strep throat, while there are going to be about 300 people here this weekend? I don't think so either.

Adam and Super Suave are coming up here this Sunday. I'm pumped. Can't wait for them to get here. Yey Adam and Super Suave!

Ask away

So he asked "If you were able to sit right across from God, and ask Him any question, and He would answer completely no matter what the question was... what would you as Him?"
Immediately, the first thing that came to my mind was... "I wouldn't ask Him for anything, I'd just give Him a hug."
I'm not sure if hugs work the same way for you as they do for me. Hugs mean a lot to me, I just love them. The way somebody hugs me tells me a lot. All I want is a big teddy bear hug from God, telling me that He's got me in His arms, I've got nothing to fear, that He's taking care of me, holding me secure.

OOOOObediajonahmicahnahum

Two cool things for you:

1. I heard a guy say "It's like taking a drink from a fire hose." Being here at NBI, I'm getting fire-hosed down with so much information and knowledge. What am I supposed to do with all this extra water being blasted at my face?

2. I've been wrestling with the idea that Satan cannot hear your thoughts. Up until about a week ago, I never thought of that before. Now that's one of the main things on my mind. If Satan can't hear my thoughts, that also means he can't plant thoughts in my head, or make me think certain things. If this is true... then I am just one messed up person. I used to blame some of my thoughts on Satan, but now I can't let myself do that. It's all my fault. It's my own sinful nature. Yuck!

The ball is rollin'.

So I came here to Nicolet with a few expectations, and those expectations are being met. But beyond that, things are happening here that I didn't expect. I could expatiate, but then it'd be like a 50 page paper, but simply put: I'm happy and more than content with everything that's going on here. If things are going this well after only the first month, I'm so excited to see what's going to happen in the next year. God is just revealing Himself to me in new ways and I'm gaining so much from Him and this place.

One thing I guess I could share with you: I've decided to start a prayer journal. And not one of those prayer journals that you do for two or three days and then forget about. I started it about a week ago, and I've missed the past few days, but I'm not just giving up and letting go. There was a phenomenal speaker this weekend that was extremely encouraging, and after listening to him I just can't give up. I'm beginning to get in the mode that my relationship with God is serious, and my habits are essential to be healthy. I'm really understanding things and seeing life more clearly. I can see clearly now the rain is gone. (Sorry, it just popped into my head and I had to sing it).

So I'm pumped about what's happening here, pray that God will keep working in my blood pumping organ.

Men's retreat

So we've got a men's retreat up here this weekend. Doesn't sound too exciting. And it's not. It's weird seeing so many people smoking around here though. Tonight at chapel, an interesting thing happened though. Almost 300 men. In one building. Singing. Loud enough to hear. It was so cool hearing one giant mass of men singing their hearts out. I don't think I've heard anything so amazing in my life. I can't wait for the next chapel!

Fire Tower

yeah i went to the fire tower again. it was so cool. and windy. man it was windy. but it was such a blast. i just love that place. if you dont know what im talkin about, scroll down and read about my last trip there.

Guitar

YEP! So I'm planning on giving some guitar lessons this year. Right now I'm giving Ivy lessons, but several others have said they want to learn. I like giving lessons. It helps me figure out better ways to teach, and it helps me get to know the person better, it helps me get better at guitar, and it helps me learn to encourage and compliment more (i really slack at encouragement). So I'm pretty excited to teach some more guitar.

Also, I've decided to start learning to play the guitar the super cool way. Not sure what it's called, but its how Matt Wilhelm plays, with the guitar flat on your lap and you just hammer down. I've only been trying for a few days, but I'm getting it, and it's a blast. Jon, you're going to be so jealous when I head out there and show you my new skills.

Me Me Me... and a Mentor

This place is starting to get me in the habit of thinking more. It's good. Any time I used to have to just sit and stare out of a window, I'd instead spend it mindlessly staring at TV. I really love not having TV here, but that's beside the point. So getting into the habit of thinking more is what I'm working on. I seem to resist taking time to do devotionals, or to just sit and talk with God, or to just simply sit there and think. I'm mad at myself for that. I love thinking. What's my problem? Why can't I just take some time and go off by myself? Well... I'm going to try my hardest to do that. Also I'm going to have some help...

At the beginning of the year, we were encouraged to get a mentor for the year. I didn't consider it. At all. Up until about a week ago, the idea popped into my mind again. I just couldn't shake this idea of getting a mentor for this year. So I thought about it and discussed it with a few people, and I've decided to get one. Today I asked somebody to be my mentor, he agreed, and I'm excited to get started. He told me having a mentor is my choice, and his role and responsibilities are up to me. It's so strange for me telling somebody how I want them to function in my life. But I need it. He asked me to email him what I want this set up to look like, I'll post it when I figure out what I need a mentor to do for me.

Fire Tower

Last night I went to Mountain's Fire Tower. If you can't figure out what a fire tower is, it's a tower which they use to look for forest fires. They don't use this one anymore because they have a new cool invention called "radar" and "satellite pictures." Anywho, they left the tower up, and made a park out of it. I'm telling you, this was one of the most gorgeous things I've ever seen in my life. All of the fall colors, and we could see fog in low spots. Just completely breathtaking. I was there with Paul, Rachel, Clair, and Drew, and we took some pictures. Maybe I'll post some on facebook someday. If any of you guys come up here, I've gotta take you to this place. It's just wicked awesome!

Quest

Tonite I had Quest. In case you dont know what Quest is, its the high school youth group at ACC (ACC is the church silver birch is connected with). Im the worship leader there (in case you didn't know). We played "Grace Like Rain," "Surrender," and "Wonderful Cross." I didn't know Grace like rain until about 2 days ago, and thier verson of wonderfull cross was weird. but the night went well.

theres only one thing that bothers me tho: I remember Jon talking about why he doesn't do worhship during youth group. He said youth group is supposed to be an outward ministry, as in you are trying to get new people to come. New people aren't going to want to "worship" a God they don't know. I think most of the people that to to Quest know God, but they just dont seem to want to worship. I know i've been doing a bad job of leading them into worship, and not just playing lead guitar. But it just bothers me when I look out at the growd and see people looking bored out of their minds, starting at the ground, looking like that wish it would be over.

I lied, there' 2 things that bothered me. during small groups, it just seemed like most of the guys had no interest in discussing anything besides jokes. it seems so discouraging to minister to these guys who seem like they dont care. I want to help them be alive for christ and help them grow, but it just seems like they dont care. remind me again why i'm there? I know that even if they dont change now, i know what i'm ministering to them now will affect them in the future. and that just happens to be good enough for me.

i washed my truck today. took 2 hours to get mud off. drove it around a bit to air dry it. ended up on dirt road. truck dirty already. backed into a fence. night time. 2 weeks ago. broken tail light. haven't put gas in it since aug 28th.

Craig-O

I just had a nice long talk with the wonderful Craig-o-licious. Man, it was nice talking with him, just catching up and such. I've missed hanging out with Craig. I remember one time where me and G made a video on his bed. Oh Geez good times. Craig, your my hero.

Does this affect you?

Today Dave said something that I can't get off of my mind. At the end of each class he has a "so what" slide, where we talk about how this affects us. He asked how this affects us. Does it affect us at all. I thought to myself... I know how it should affect me, but did it really affect me. I'm gaining so much knowledge, but am I being transformed? I don't know. I've been here for a month, but I don't know if anything is changing.

Dells of Eau Claire

Today I had a blast! Ivy took us to a place called the "dells of eau claire." It's not by eau claire and its not like the dells, so don't ask how it got the name, but just know it was awesome. I'll get some pics posted up on facebook soon. Anywho, it was just a state park where there were some awesome rock formations with some small waterfalls and such to explore. I went swimming in some parts of the river and went explorin in some other parts. I really couldn't tell how much fun it was. Then we went to wally world, and culvers. I had a mind oreo concrete mixer with andes mints. Oh my gosh, it was pretty much the most delicious thing on earth. YUM! you should go get one... right now

My Mad Gab for the day

Won ship pawn hut tie hum, their lift tame an an deed hid hint heat an heating. Soup her hung we, huh long Whit tis broth there, Esau ape heat saw Whit pep hero knee and am. Deal hish us sit haste hid! E. hate up pete sauce soup her phast. Wood ewe lie hick sum?

Fasting got off to a slow start

This last Monday, I don't remember why, but this idea of fasting popped into my mind. On Tuesday one of the teachers said something, but it spoke to me like "Tony, you need to fast." Then Thursday it happened with another teacher. Then there was one more thing that happened, I don't remember what, that pushed me to fast. So I decided that today I was going to fast.

It started off great. I woke up, and actually remembered not to eat... that is until breakfast time came around. I was working in the kitchen today, and the boss told me I could go eat quickly. I was like "sweet, im famished." So I get my tray full of food, and as I'm pouring cereal into my bowl I think "Crap. I forgot I'm fasting today." I then stood there for a minute debating whether I should eat it or not. I figured... I have the food on my plate, I can fast tomorrow. The whole time I'm eating my food, I'm thinking "This isn't right. I shouldn't be eating this."

I continued eating it anyways, and planned on fasting tomorrow. Then I was talking to Jon about it, and basically he convinced me that I could just start then, and go until noon tomorrow. So since then thing's have been going... interesting. Man, I'm just so freaking hungry! I got food all around me, delicious food! I want to eat it all... so badly. But I've got a purpose today, a goal--I'm going to succeed.

I'm not sure if it's got anything to do with me fasting, but I really feel God tugging at me. I'm in a mode where I'm angrily challenging myself, my beliefs, and motives. Lets just leave it at this: It has been one interesting day.

Insights

Here is a list of all of the "insights" I've had here at NBI so far. They aren't just insights I've had. Some are things I've realized, some are me revealing what I feel about certain things, some are crazy awesome things my teachers have said. Some are just random whatevers. Here they are:

• I feel like I'm missing out on something because I've always been in church.
• Problems in relationships root in lack of forgiveness and holding on to bitterness and unsolved issues
• When you choose to follow God, don't expect an easy walk in the park.
• Pharaoh says "Who is the Lord, that I should obey?"
• Can God be trusted?
• Disbelief is not rewarded
• Truth is not debatable.
• Don't believe all you hear
• I've tried this one before "God, if you want me to do this, move the clock as a sign" How would you know if God moved it. If all satan has to do is move a clock, he'd do it.
• Are you going to choose to bless yourself, or let God bless you?
• Can you take care of yourself better than God can?
• Many (by that I don't mean a few, I mean many... hundreds of thousands of millions of billions of trillions... ok maybe not that far, but many) believe they are Christians, but they aren't
• I try to surround myself with people who support my sins--who justify my sins. Also, when I want to hear a certain answer, I'll ask somebody who I know will give me that answer.
• Greed and Gluttony need to be defined. Is greed bad? What is considered greed?
• Read the bible to know God, know yourself, and know HIs love for you
• My heart is desperately wicked.
• Life is deeper than I think
• Don't understand your love language. Understand the love language of the one you love.
• If you can't see yourself clearly, watch out.
• Don't reshape God, rather Discover Him.
• Do you come up to me and say "Tony, I don't believe you exist"? Why do we do that to God. What is he supposed to say to us when we say that besides "uh... hello I'm right in front of you"
• Worship because you love Him.
• God is not here for your convenience.
• Feeling comes after love. Why do we seek the feeling so that we may have love?
• I truly have a blessed life.
• The only reason you defy God is because you don't know what you're doing.
• What are you in charge of? What's God in charge of? Now how important do you think you are?
• Investigating the bible and Jesus Christ can only reveal truth.

Those aren't all of them, but that's all I have written down. Also, just because I understand all of these are important ideas/questions doesn't mean that I understand them and am changed. I'm just being loaded with so much new information, and new ways of thinking about things. I am changing and growing though!

Oye se la sacapunta!

Yeah. Man what a day. I don't ever want to do that much homework in one day again. I'm finally finished and sitting on the couch with the coolest person ever... her name is rachel peterson. she's fricken awesome. And I'm just wicked tired. The last thing I want to do is get up tomorrow morning to have class at 8. You know what I'm sayin? Shoot. Psh.

I am also super hungry right now, but aint nothin good in the PK. There's 'tatoes in there, hehehe, and refried beans. uh he he and and and ouhghth uh hu he and bread but i dont want none that. I got a bag of Lays Baked BBQ chips up on my dresser that Imma go eat before i head to bed.

Yeah. Im going to bed now

estudiar

hola. me llamo es antonia. raquel es me chica favorita! haha. good joke. anyways.

Estoy estudiar todo el dia. Tengo mucho tarea y nesicito ir a Walmart or the Farm Store. Yo no se si estes muchachas conmigo. Y yo no se nada, pero su madre huele de caca.

Day 2

Today is slightly better than yesterday. I'm plowing through my hw. Just finished up my Hermeneutics (i hate that word). I can't decided if i wanna start my OT survey or Theology hw next. I'm gettin pretty pissed off at these computers here, I really want to keep all of my work I do on the computer, and my jump drives dont work now. And i'm just irritate with how much stuff is blocked on here. I mean, I tried downloaded an attachment that jon sent me, and it wouldn't even let me do that. AHHHHHHH! I want to pound a sledge hammar into somebody's face!

Anyways, I did a whole crapload of housecleaning and maintainence work today. I was all over the place doin this and that. Washin cars, sweepin, mopin, dustin, vacuumin, cleanin bathrooms, cleanin windows, moving furniture, organizin crap in the kitchen, and who knows what else.

I was really hopin i could easily get my hw done bw yesterday and today, but got nothin done yesterday and I worked today until 4... so we'll se how late i get to stay up tonite!

Off Day

Today was just one of those off-days. I didn't really get much done, despite my few attempts. And I just felt off for most of the day. And then there's that problem that I've been thinking about for the past few days that's been bothering me. I'm not looking forward to this week much.

Kinda random, but I think I'm going to fast this saturday.

I'm contemplating trimming my goatee down.

I've gotten no hw done from thursday, and it's due tuesday, and I work tomorrow.

I'm really want to go 4 wheelin.

I've watched a few movies in the past few days, which is against the rules here. Today I heard Ivy talking about that today (she wasn't talking to me, she didn't even know I watched a few movies), but I still felt convicted and decided I'm not going to watch movies anymore... maybe.

One of my credit cards increased the limit from 600 to 1100. Yey me. I'm not going to use it at all. Yey me.

Yes terd Hay.

OH what a day yesterday was. We had our first chapel, which went surprisingly well. I played guitar, Luke played bass, Justin Steve and Pete sang, another Pete played "drums." I put drums in quotations because his "drum" was one of those Culligan man water buckets. There's no drumset here, so that's the closest thing we had to one. Speaking of which... got a drumset you want to donate? Anywho, we had our first meeting/practice the night before, which lasted about an hour and a half. I'm interested to see how things will work out.

After de chapel, I had to clean the canteen (not by myself), which was completely filthy. It took a good 3 hours to clean (and thats with 3 other people)... It would have taken like a whole day to clean alone. Then we had to wash SBR's bus, which was also flithy. It was funny: Rachel and Justin climbed on the top of the bus and they asked what all the black stuff was and we were told it was mold. How sick is that? Anyway, that took about 2 hours.

Then came the swimming. Anna, Justin, Rachel, Clair and I went. Except I had to throw Rachel and Clair in, and they got out right away cuz it was too cold... and it was cold, but you get used to it quickly.

OH yeah, then lastnight me and a few others decided to watch the matrix trilogy. We got to bed at about 230. Late night. But it was fun.

Today I'm working in the kitchen from 11-7, but I'm on break right now. I'm super sore today too. I think my soreness is a combination of my best rainy day (scroll down to read if you already haven't... which you should have already read. shame on you if you haven't) and cleaning all day. I don't really spend too much time just chillin out relaxin. you know what I'm sayin?

OTAY. ts'ALL FOR NOW

Best Rainy Day Ever

So despite being in class from 8-3, and my first worship meeting that lasted like 2 hours, yesterday was a freakin awesome day. It was raining about the whole day. After class I went on a bike ride in the rain, which was flippin wicked fantabulous. That was so much fun getting soaked and muddy. Then after that i played football in the field in the rain with 5 others. Not that football is my thing, but just playin in the rain and goofin around was inexplicably fun. after that we went swimming in the lake. It may not sound like it, but it was just so much fun. I haven't ever really played in the rain like that before, so it was a great first-ish experience. Then I watched movies illegally till about midnight. What a sweet day. I just can't get over how delicious it was. You're jealous.

Biblical Theology

So I just finished up with my first class of the day, Biblical Theology. A few things stuck out to me, and I just thought I would share them with you, my loyal fans.

1. Let's say that one day you come up to me and say, "Tony, I don't believe you exist." What am I going to say back to you? What the heck can I say to you? I mean... hello, I'm right in front of your face, what do you mean I don't exist. Why then, do we say that to God? Why do we demand He proves his existence to us? It's just rediculous, God is all around us. We see God in nature, we see God in fellow Christians, we see God in the Bible. He is in plain sight, but we still tell Him to prove his existence to us. How ludicrous. (btw, I do this all the time)

2. Say I'm married. I'd give gifts to my wife because I love her. I don't give gifts so that I love her. A big struggle for me (and many I know), is that we don't get "the feeling." Often I wonder where the feeling is. To me that says I don't have the love. I'm searching for the feeling to get the love, when it should be the other way around.

There's ideas like this that God shows to me. I hate it because I understand them... but I just really don't get them. I continually seek God in ways that don't work. I don't get why I can't get it. Arg.

Nicolet and Me.

So I've got three classes as of right now. My three teachers all said something like this: "This year at Nicolet, our primary goal is not that you learn a lot. Our primary goal is not that you would make new friends, or memorize the bible, or become like a "super christian." Our goal is that you grow in Christ. If you treat everything here like you're regular classes, where you rush through the hw, and study only if you have to, then you know... you get out of it what you put into it. You pour your heart into it, and bring God into all of the studying, then you will grow. If you choose to seek God, seek to know him, seek to understand him, then you will."

On the first day I was here, I was telling somebody that I heard there was a ton of hw. I remember saying "I usually fly through hw without a problem, and I never study." Man.. now I'm at the point where I know this year will suck if I rush through my hw, and dont study. At this moment, I've gotta make the desicion to commit to working my hardest and commit to seeking God. I have made that commitment.

Honestly, I really dont want to make it, because I'm lazy. Because there's other stuff that right now I deem more important, more enjoyable. Also, because I'm scared of the change that I know will come. Reguardless, I'm going to chase after God this year. I've got plans to help me along the way when I get lazy and scared and all that mumbo jumbo. Pray for me guys, that I stick to those plans. Pray that God would keep chasing after me and shout at me when I'm not listening. Thanks.

The decree of God

The sovereign purpose of God is defined theologically as the decree of God. The decree of God includes all that God accomplishes through natural law, all events and actions that God does Himself, and all acts of humans. Though we cannot understand it, God has come up with a system whereby He has given humans freedom of choice--yet this all-wise God, in complete knowledge of what humanity will do, has come up with a perfect, divine plan.
The divine plan includes all that has happened , such as Adam and Eve being permitted to sin so that there could be the divine remedy of Christ's death and the eternal fellowship of believers with God. It includes all enemies of God being made the footstool of Christ and their eternal rejection.
"It is not a blind, mechanical philosophy of fatalism but an intelligent, loving wise plan in which man, responsible for his choices, is held accountable for what he does and is rewarded for his good work. Before such a God man can only bow in submission, love and adoration" (Chafer, 1947, vol. 1)

-Strengthened by Grace: A systematic Theology Handbook, Richard E. Wager

Polygamy rocks

So yesterday, (i'm not sure how this first part came to be, but) I was "married" to a student here, Rachel. Then we decided polygamy would be a cool thing to try. So I proposed to Clair, another student here. Right now they're fighting for my attention. It's just jokin around, but its so awkward having two girls fight for my time.

Additionally, I totally got stung by a bee today. I mean, what the heck. I was just walking around looking for my bike (which i'm starting to get angry about) and I feel this extremely intense stabbing in my achillies. It hurt so bad that I just hit it away before I could take a look at it, but I'm pretty sure it was a bee. Theres a huge hole in my leg (I exaggerate just a bit) and it's all hard and swollen and it hurts like a beast. You know what I'm sayin? That stupid bee stung me for no reason, I didn't swat at it or nothing. It was just like "welp, i think i'll sting this guy." I hope its one of those bees that dies after it stings.

Yesht Herd Hay (Yesterday)

Yesterday was a pretty good day for me. It consisted of me awaking at about 930, after a great nights rest. Then I did my dish crew duties, which wasn't too bad. After that I don't remember what I did... And then I went horseback riding for about an hour, which was pretty enjoyable... if you know what I'm sayin. Then we had this wicked exciting (can you hear the sarcasm?) safety meeting. I got to dip about early though, because I had to go to my first Quest meeting.

Quest is the name of the high school youth group at Antigo Community Church. I will be their worship leader for the year. Lastnight was just a small bonfire/get-together. I rode out there with Ivy(i have no idea if that's how you spell it), and two other girls. It was an awkward experience b/c the only person I knew there was Ivy. And of course, being the kind of person I am, I refrained from socializing. We also had a short "worship sesson." Me and another guy practiced 3 songs in about 2 minutes, so you can guess how well the "worship" went.

Anyway, after that was all done, we came back to camp, and I did hw for a while. I got a little done. I still got a lot to do by tomorrow, but I'll still avoid it as long as I can.

TIS IT!

Where's your crapper?!?

I gotta take a massive poop!

Invisible Blog

Hey guys, I just figured out that I can blog, it's just that I can't see anyone else's. I can log in and all that jazz, it's just when i type in tonynelson.blogspot.com or jonduey.blogspot.com it's blocked... So i shall be blogging. I'll see if I can get the techie here to unblock that, but I will continue to try to post all my exciting jazz for you.

So I'm moved in to Nicolet. It's my fifth day here. It seems like it's been longer. I'm getting to know the other 17 students, along with the staff, pretty quickly. I'm staying in the Chalet, which is above the Fix It. My specific room is called Cedar. My roommate is Luke Bihl. I already broke my bike. We're supposed to sign up to do some kind of ministry outside of SBR, and one called for a worship leader for the affiliated church's high school yg. I'm the only guy here that can play and sing... so I guess I'm up for it. I think they say we should expect to give about 4 hours to our outside ministry. I'm not sure if that's realistic for what I would want to do with them. At least it's an opportunity to lead some people into worship (and actually lead, i've been involved in being part of a worship team, just not leading it really).

Oh let's see... what else can I dump on you? The computers here are super slow, so if you want to donate a laptop to me, you would become my hero! My classes are: Bible Study 101 (Hermeneutics), Old Testament Survey, Bible Theology/Doctrine. We'll also be starting one more class next Friday, but I'm not sure what it is yet.

I really didn't know what to expect coming here, but the few expectations I did have (which I wouldn't know how to explain) are totally off. This place is such a change for me. It's not what I expected, but it's not better or worse. It's just what it is. It's gonna be a long year tho, that's all I know. That's all for now, folks

It's Good bye Day

It's my last day as a resident of Kenosha, WI. Tomorrow I leave for Nicolet. I've got to admit, it has totally sneaked up on me. About a month ago, I was pure excited to go. As it gets closer, though, I get more and more nervous... almost to the point where I'm not excited at all. I've a lot of crap packed up, I'm just about ready to go, but it still feels like I wont be leaving for a long time. I guess tomorrow when I wake up I will feel surprised that the day hath come.

Either way, I know this year will be a grand adventure. Gimme one week, and I'll be blogging about how awesome it is at Nicolet!

Nicolet

He asked me "Are you ready to go to Nicolet?"
I says "Heck no!" I got nothing packed.
"Not licked packed ready but ready to leave ready"

As the days are counted down to the day I leave, I seem to become more and more apprehensive about going. I guess it's just really hitting me now. I AM going to Nicolet, to be gone for a WHOLE YEAR. I talked with Craig about what Nicolet will be like, but that was a long time ago... I forgot most of what he said. I just feel more and more unprepared, and I get nervous b/c I really don't know what to expect.

So I'm nervous. Excited. Unprepared. Anxious. Pumped. Dreaded. Bedazzled (not really, but it's a cool word, isnt it?). Either way, it's going to be a wicked awesome year... I hope!

I did another one of those things where before you do it, you know it's wrong, but you go ahead and do it anyways. Somebody save me from myself.

Turns out it was my fault all along. I failed. Right from the start. Kept on failing right through the end. Sorry doesn't cut it, but I am.

Dryed Out

Sitting in church on Sunday, I look around. People look bored, almost dead. I talk to people about the service. They complain about worship feeling stagnant and not really exciting; they complain about the message being dry and boring. It's all about them. They think it's all about them. God demands you worship, even if the music isn't your style. God still speaks truth through people, even if you are bored by it, or when you don't connect with the speaker. When are they gonna stop being selfish and listen to their creator?

2 crazy days

So Tuesday I get up at 8 to scrape paint off of Everette Barks' house. Did that till about 2, then played 27 holes of disc golf. Then a 5 hour bike ride (ok, not that long, but it seemed like it). Spent the night at Adam's house. Stayed up till 3. Then Wednesday got up at 9 and went to six flags all day. Steak dinner at Lone Star. Drive around for an hour. Come home and jump on computer. Man, that's just too much for me to do. I think I gotta go to six flags again tomorrow with my little sister. Boy oh boy am I tired.

What's up?
I have been up to no good.
Starting forest fires.
Stealing candy from babies.
Breaking the law.
Thieving Identities.
Killing innocent rocks.
Lying.
Drive-by shootings.
NOT EATING MY VEGETABLES!
You?

Cheater

So, this idea of cheating popped up in church today. Pastor Anderson used this verse today and it got me thinkin...

"You will call me 'my husband'; you will no longer call me 'my master.'" God says that's in Hosea 2:16. So in my mind these questions pop up: Does that mean each time we sin, we cheat on God? How many times will God let us cheat on Him before He stops alluring us back?


Those questions kinda make me feel bad, and they scare me. Being cheated on feels horrible, and I cheat on God each time I sin. It kind of makes me want to not sin. Ever again. What do you think?

Disc Golf, y el basso

So I'm officially hardcore hooked on disc golf. This past week I went about 4 or 5 times. This week I'll do the same. Adam lost my first and favorite disc a few times ago, and last time I went, Jesse found it. My hope is restored. I've been discing it at Parkside's course. It's a decent course, its much shorter than Indianola's. They are redoing half of the course, so Adam and I thought holes 7-11 were being built, but last time I went, I found them. So me and Adam will go tomorrow and show those holes who's boss.

Today I get to play bass in church. I can't decide if I should enjoy it or view it as a chore. I don't really want to play bass my last sunday here, but w/e. It's been a few months since I've played my bass; I've been playing Jon's bass there in Indianola. So it will be good to get back in touch with my own bass.

Let's get it on!

Mad

Do you ever do something knowing that it will make you mad? Man does that make me mad! It's like it hurts so good. But I hate it! AHHHH!!!!!!!!

Noah's Ark

Yesterday I went to Noah's Ark, America's Largest water park, located in Wisconsin Dells. Not the best day to go there weather-wise, but not the worst. Lines were super short. We didn't wait more than like ten or 15 minutes for any ride. "We" is me, the Medina family -Grandma, and the Gerlach family -Tim. It was just a blast. It sucked getting up at 7 in the morning, but it was definitely worth it. There were so many funny things that we said and did, it was just unforgettable. "Excuse me, are these free samples? ...Yes sir they are... Well, then how much do they cost?... nothing, they're free... so you're telling me there is no charge for these samples? ...yes sir, totally free... well, let me go grab my wallet then, how much did you say they were?... i said they were free... oh, well i dont have enough money then. bye." Man adam and I laughed hard for a good five or ten minutes. like the laughing to where your stomach starts to hurt and tears are pouring out of your eyes. Good times, they are amazing.

Home

So I'm home. Home in Kenosha. It's good to be back, but it sucks to be back. There's things I really missed here, but there are things I now miss from Indianola. It's kinda like an emotional roller coaster. One minute I'm having a great time, the next minute I'm depressed about missing you guys from ICC. Even though I usually enjoy what I do, I just can't stay happy for very long. It's just kinda rough on me all this moving and changing and stuff.

Potluck/Baptism/Pool Party

Lastnight, at the Indianola Aquadic center, ICC held it's annual baptism party. Let me tell you, I haven't had that much fun for awhile. Just hanging out with all my childs was fun. I had such a blast. It kinda sucked having that pool party two days before I leave, because now it's even harder to say good bye. Now I'm totally at a point where I know a ton of the students at ICC and I just hate to leave them now! I'm going to work my hardest to come back as much as I can (which will probably be like every 3 months or something liker that). Just want you guys to know that you're great, you're wonderful, and I'm going to miss you tons.

Disc Golf

Yesterday I went disc golfing with Ian and Aaron. It was a blast. I ended up with a great score too. I was only 6 over par; its a new record for me. I am also beginning to build up a set. I've got 2 drivers, 2 putters, and 2 or 3 midrangers. It was super hot out there, but we all had fun. We went at about 1, and then lastnight at about 1130 i found a tic on my knee. That sucker was chillin there for like 10 hours. What a bum.

SBR

Silver Birch Ranch. What a week. So much happened. I couldn't even guess where to start. The week was fun, relaxing, exciting, stressful, awkward, competitive, educational, tiring, relational, thrilling... It was a week of memories, learning, growing, and making new friends. "Oooouuuch" "BOW MY NUTS!" "UR MOM"
Despite Satan working his hardest there, distracting us and attempting to inhibit our growth, God still showed up and releaved Himself to us. Spiritually, it was a rough week. It wasn't the normal silver birch experience. Satan put up a really good fight this week and held us up a lot. God still showed each person something new. God helped us grow closer to Him and to each other. Satan faught good, but God came out on top and won this week. Thank God for his plan, and how powerful and good He is.

180 Game Nite

Lastnight we had our game night for 180, as the title says. Around 15 showed up. Pretty fair turnout being Father's Day. We played Garbage, Golf, 3-2-13, Mau, Guitar Hero, Ping Pong, and Wii. It was a fun night; I got to know the students better, and I'm still working on remembering peoples names. The memorable quotes from the night: "That's what she said," "Derek is a sexy beast," and "That's the way, uh huh uh huh, I like it." You guys are fun to hang out with, and I can't wait to go to camp with y'alls.

Minigolf

Last night I took our high schoolers minigolfing. Sounds so simple and easy, but here's what I learned:

1. leading 25 strangers is not hard, but extrememly awkward the first time
2. doing anything with these kids is really fun, even doing something as simple as minigolfing
3. i dont need to worry about being judged by anybody here
4. i suck at minigolf

It was a fun night, and I look forward to working with the Rock students this wednesday.

Surprise Surprise

Like I said before, this job isn't what I expected at all. Yesterday I spent my entire 8 hours of work doing manual labor. Not stuff like Jon saying "Oh go do this for me" but like Jon, Brad and I moving a 500 lb stage out and around the church. To a certain degree, I expceted training on how to write a lesson, where to look for ideas... you know, stuff you'd expect a youth pastor to be doing. I'm finding out there's a lot more to being a Youth Pastor than I imagined... which is good. I like that I've been doing in the past 4 days. Yeah, I've been super busy and am tired (it would be awesome if I had my futon to sleep on), but I enjoy doing this stuff.

Lastnight I talked to my mom and faith and briefly sara. My mom was talkin away and I wasn't saying much. She said it seemed like I didn't want to talk much, and honestly I didn't. I knew all you guys missed me, but I didn't really feel like I missed you guys, and I didn't really feel like talking to you. But the fact is that I do miss you guys. I miss everyone there and everything I did there. It's great here and I'm having a great time, but I have a lot of people that I care about and miss. I'm really looking forward to coming home tomorrow. I can't wait to see you guys.

And thus it begins

Today was officially my first day as a Youth Pastor's Intern. What can I say? I didn't quite know what to expect, yet I'm still surprised at what I will be doing this summer. I don't really know how to explain what I will be learning besides this: how to be a youth pastor. There's plenty of things to do, but not an overwhelming amount. I'm pretty sure the tasks of the job istelf I can handle, its just the planning and scheduling that I will struggle with. Jon says I gotta plan things out and make a schedule. That's hard for me because I haven't really scheduled anything earlier than the day before. I'll let you know more about what I'm learning as I get settled into my job.

Outside of that, I got here okay. A few interesting things happened on the way though (ask if you wanna know, its just too long to type). I've got all settled down in my "room." It's just a little corner in their basement about 6x7. It's just perfect though; I'm more than content with it. It's strange being away from home, all my friends and family (and the lovely Megin). I kinda feel like I'm on vacation... but then again I don't. It's weird, I know. I miss you all already and I still have forgotten to let Jon know you all say hello, but I will tonite!... if i remember...

That's all for now, gotta go take a crap-o-la

Youth-Pastor-Intern Tony

Iowa

I leave for Iowa next Sunday. Ten days away. This is really sneaking up on me. I'm ready, but I'm not. I can't wait to get going and learning and growing. I feel... unprepared. I'm not quite sure what I need to do before I go there. I don't know what I need to bring there. The biggest thing is I don't have a car yet. What's worse is that I haven't really been praying about it either. I'm trusting God that He'll provide for me, but I'm over-trusting Him, like I expect Him to give me a car. God will give you what you need, but you gotta pray for it. I'm just skipping step one and expecting step two.
...just now my dad pulled into the driveway, we're about to go out and look for cars. its good, but... I have no money saved up. I dont think my dad has a few thousand to pull out right now either for a car. blah blah blah....

The Gathering

So last night we had the Gathering at H20. It was amazing. Probably the best Gathering we've had in a while. I could ramble on forever on everything that happened, but I'll just tell you what hit me the hardest, and I'll make it short.
We (youth pastors and leaders) were told to go grab students one at a time and pray for them. I prayed for a few people. Then I went back to my seat and got back to worshiping. The whole time we were praying, the band was playing a song and singing, we could pray or sing or do whatever we wanted, so I was singing. I look to my left and see this guy who's about 35 and I get the strongest feeling that I need to go pray with him. I talk myself out of it and avoid looking at him. Then about 5 minutes after I'm over it, Megin leans over and asks me "why didn't you pray with that man." Man was I crushed. I knew I was supposed to pray with that guy, and chickened out, ignored my feelings. Well after the Gathering was over Megin took him aside and prayed with him. Turns out he needed some prayer. I had a chance to pray with this guy, and God was shouting at me, telling me to pray and I didn't do it. I missed out, and I felt horrible.
Besides that, the Gathering was wicked awesome. God was totally working in everybody there. You could just feel something great was happening in that room. I never feel like I'm worshiping God, but monday night, I was totally giving all of me to Him. I held nothing back and completely gave Him what he deserved... the hard part now is continuing to do that, but I'm trying.

This cat loves this horse


only the sound is funny

I got accepted into Nicolet. WOO HOO! I am in need of a new truck, less than 4 geez. I got a new book from my Aunt entitled, "how to find God in a crazy mixed up world" by Tim Lehaye. I like it so far, its pretty good info. My dad's car has been in the shop for a like a week and I've been without mine cuz my dad gets mine. Man it sucks not having a car after being used to having one at your disposal!

Sicko

So I'm definitely sick. The doctor said I have Pharyngitis. Then she put me on Azithromycin. I went to the doctor yesterday and took my first pills yesterday, and I feel worse today. Runny/stuffy nose, heavy chest, tons of phlegm (I secretly enjoy eating my phlegm), I'm really low on energy and I'm tired (but when I lay down to go to sleep I can't fall asleep). AH it's poopy. I dont remember the last time i was sick. And it sucks real bad.
My Aunt June is in town this week. She got here yesterday at like seven in the evening and will stay here till the weather isn't too bad for her to drive home.

Lucky Number Slevin

Man, it's been over a month since my last blog. Yeah, I'm a slacker. So here's what's going on:

• I sent in some forms for my internship; its definitely going to happen. I cant tell you how excited I am to head out to Iowa. It should be wicked awesome
• I'm sending in my forms for Nicolet tomorrow. I hope I didn't procrastinate too much. Honestly, I have no clue what I'll do if I dont get in to Nicolet.
• My fridge is snoring.
• I stole from a store for the first time. (But I am gonna bring it back next time I go back to that store, so it's more like borrowing, and no, i'm not gonna do it ever again)
  
• I didn't read that Star Wars book. Too many big words.
  
• I have gone on just one road through Romans.
• I'm officially addicted to texting.
• My credit cards are almost maxed and I dont have much money in my account.
• I'm getting worn out again.
  

Neub hook.

Just bought a new book. I know, I've never said those words before. I bought The Gospel According to Star Wars. So far I've read just the introduction. If the rest of the book is going to be like the intro, I'm not sure if I can handle it. It looks like a good book, but it might just be too much for me. Also, I haven't read Proverbs for like a week. I know, I suck. Here's whats coming up for me:
1) I'm going to Iowa the 27-29th(or 30th)
2) I'm giving the message for the Easter Sunrise Service. I've got no clue what I'm going to talk about. I'm not even up in front of anybody, but I'm insanely nervous already. Terrificationified.
3) If all goes well, I'm going to do an internship this summer. I'll be Jon's intern for like 2 or 3 months.
4) I bought a sweet Beach Boys CD. I like the Beach Boys because I remember, being a young'un, on road trips my dad would always play the Beach Boys, so I like them because they remind me of when I was a children child kid boy. YO!

Also, I gave everybody in the middle school youth group a new nickname. My name is "your majesty" sweet, eh?

Title wafe

1. i need a new cell, mine sucks
2. reading my bible has seized (except for proverbs)
3. there's a new girl in town
4. new internship opportunity
5. im going to sleep now
   

Exodus

So I've got 11 chapters left in Exodus. The last like 5 chapters have been a drag. It was just an extremely repetitive description of offerings and alters and the tabernacle and priest clothing and my gosh. It was just rough to get through. I know there's a reason (which i'm not sure of) but is there really a reason to be that in-depth and repetitive. One chapter is God's description of how to make the clothes. The next chapter is a description of Moses giving people the description of how to make the clothes. Cant they just say, here's how you make the clothes, then say they made them? Whatever. Genesis was totally exciting to read and Exodus has kinda seemed boring. Maybe I'm missing something... maybe not.

Proverb

Proverbs 15:9 The Lord hates how sinners live. But he loves those who run after what is right. (NIRV) A life frittered away disgusts God; he loves those who run straight for the finish line. (The Message) I included both version because they each say a little bit different things to me. "the Lord hates how sinners live" sticks out to me because I live like a sinner. "run straight for the finish line." i want that to be my goal, my purpose. Everything I do should be for God, but it isn't always like that. Today I will strive for that.

No school for you.... pthua!

I convinced my mom to let me skip this semester of school. YES! But, its on one condition: I must go to Nicolet next year. That's fine with me. Nicolet sounds like a great experience, although a year away from all I have here seems a stretch. Also, if I go to Nicolet, I'll be needing a more reliable car. So I'm on the look for a new car. I did find a Dodge Dakota sport truck for 3500. Don't know anything else about the car. I wouldn't mind driving that beast around.

Proverb

12-13 There's a way of life that looks harmless enough;
look again—it leads straight to hell.
Sure, those people appear to be having a good time,
but all that laughter will end in heartbreak.

Proverb

Today my proverb is 12:21 "No evil can overwhelm a good person, but the wicked have their hands full of it." Often I feel overwhelmed by the filth of my sin. It pounds against my heart, relentlessly, refusing to give up. I give in to my sin all the time. Why does it overcome? Why do I let it? Many reason, but either way it's time to change it.

Proverb

Today, I read Proverbs 11. I've decided to read the NIV first and then read the message. It seems to be more understandable to me. Here's the verse I picked out for today. 14 Without good direction, people lose their way; the more wise counsel you follow, the better your chances.

Proverb

Today is the tenth, so I read Proverbs 10. The one verse I picked out, that stuck out to me was verse 17. In The Message, it says "The road to life is a disciplined life; ignore correction and you're lost for good." I don't lack discipline in my life, I'm just disciplined to do the wrong things. Discipline is just a set or system of rules and regulations. I've got my own set that I'm stuck on. With this new year, I've made some resolutions, and I'm trying to change my set of rules. I will discipline myself in a whole new way.

Genesis

I just finished reading Genesis. I started just before Christmas, and just got to the end today. I'm actually kind of disappointed that it's over. I really enjoyed reading about Jacob and Joshua and all that jazz. I would like to learn more about the peeps in Genesi (not Genesis, but Genesi (jen-ihs-eye)).

Chicago

Our time with Jon didn't end there. As our trip to Iowa ended Sunday, he needed to go to Chicago for his Moody class (classes?). About an hour away from Moody, he decided to run over a hitch in the road and caused a flat. Except the tire didn't go flat until we were going to leave moody. After a little bit of work and getting wet in the January rain, we got the spare on and he spent the night at my house. Monday morning we returned to Moody with the fixed tire and attempted to swap the spare for the fixed tire... OOOHHH NOOO! SLAM!!!! As the car was jacked up, without a tire on, the jack falls over and the car crumbles to the ground without a tire on. What a sight. well, we got it fixed, but it was still an...interesting tire change. Then me and adam went down again on wednesday to hang with jon. we arrived there at about 250, and jon didn't get outta class till 5, so we went to portillos (the best hot dog and burger joint in chicago) and to Sports Authority, which may be the biggest sports store in the world. after jon got outta class, we went to sports authority again cuz jon wanted to see it. then we went to giordano's (which has some super delicious pizza with like a pound of cheese per bite). then we went back to his dorm to recuperate. we watched some more youtube videos and then went to the coolest mcdonalds in the world to get some shakes. after that we called it a night. no more jon until march! poop poop butt butt!

Iowa

January third through sixth, Adam and I went to Iowa to visit Jon and lead worship at his church on Sunday. This was our third trip out there, and each time we go it seems to be more and more fun. Leading like 250 people in worship was a little different than usual, but at the same time tons of fun. That combination of playing new songs along with playing with Jon makes a memorable experience. Besides worship, we made tons of other great memories: The fruitcake lady ("i'd go up to her and smack the piss outta her"); achmed the dead terrorist (shut-up, i kill you); drinking about a thousand gallons of sparkling white grape juice; attempting and failing to make a diet coke and mentos rocket; playing our new ping-pong game (sacapunta) for like 6 hours and then being sore on our whole bodies for like 4 days; seeing national treasure (OOO it's obvious... the two towers resolute: lets go to the queens desk); teaching Ruthie and Micah "peace out" in a deep voice (i'm adding gangsta next time i go back); smelling some of the worst gas ever!; and of course, going to our usual Godfathers, OCB, Lone star, and having Sarah's tacos. This trip was full of memories, it was just a blast. i cant wait till we go back again!