Heratio the Fox: Installment: Third of Three thus far

That which follows is the third-most addition to the instant classic "Heratio the Fox." For more information, please press 3. Para espanol, primera cuatro.

There once was a sly fox. This sly fox was cunning and dashingly good looking, eh? It has been one week since the bus incident, and Heratio got board. Like literally, he got a board. Of wood. From the forest that he burnt down, but some planks were left over that he rememberd he could use for certain things.

PAUSE! Please pardon the interruption, but some slight clarifications are needed to be made. Please note the fact that Heratio's name is not pronounced "her-aye-shyo" like you probably thought. His name is pronounced "her-ASH-yo" with the emphasis on the "ASH."

Resume film.

So Heratio was lumbering with his planks that he found. He thought the wood smelt good, so he thinked to himself that they might be-est pleasuring to eat, or rather, consume (but not consummate, just consume). So he took a small whale-sized bit of the plank that was near-most to himself, and he began to chew it. He got a sliver inbetween A tooth and his gums, and it hurt real bad, but he knew it would be worth it to chew through the pain, cuz it tasted so good. After that all was well, at least until be preceded to swollow, at which point he got this strange discomforted look upon his face, for he was choking and he threw it all up. It was mostly just wood, from the plank that he was eating, but there was a little bit of Buffalo Wild Wings mixed in, because he ate at there earlier today (for it was now about the 8th hour).

Speaking of Buffalo Wild Wings, now would be an optimal time to explain Heratio's (remember its pronounced her-ash-yo) terrible encounter with the ugly-betty waitress at Buffalo Wild Wings. So Heratio walked in to a Buffalo Wild Wings on the corner of 9th and 5th. You know where this is, yeah, bru, huh? And this was one of them Buffalo Wild Wings where foxes weren't allowed. At least, to say the least, Heratio was slightly engaged, or rather enraged. He was actually extremely enraged. He pulled out his Citizen's card proving once and for all that he was a citizen of the United States just as much as all the humans in there. So Betty, the waitress that was mentioned earlier (as the ugle-betty waitress, remember?), reluctantly gave him a table. Except he was a fox, and fox are tiny so he needed to be seated at a kiddy table. Turns out though, that it was a decoy fox, and the real Heratio the fox had walked in and demanded a regular-sized table. For Heratio was a camel-sized fox, if you can recall from "Heratio the Fox: Episode 2." Betty sighed and reluctantly gave him a table for three, for Heratio was having a guest in addition to his decoy fox. Heratio got 37 wings with no sauce. He ate every single one. All of them. Except he couldn't finish 2 of them, because he could tell they weren't Kosher.

So back to where Heratio had thrown up the wood. He decided that it may not be a good idea to eat wood again, probably. So he vowed to never eat wood that would certainly make him choke. But he might eat wood that wouldn't for sure make him choke.

That's it for now. So until next time, which will probably be soon, good bye.